The Episcopal Way

(with apologies to Frank Loesser)

Wimberly: When I joined this church

As a brash young man,

Well, I said to myself,

"Now, brash young man,

Don't get any ideas."

Well, I stuck to that,

And I haven't had one in years.

Henderson: You play it safe.

Wimberly: I play it the Episcopal way;

Wherever the church puts me

There I stay.

Henderson: But what is your point of view?

Wimberly: I have no point of view.

Henderson: Supposing the church thinks . . .

Wimberly: I think so too.

Henderson: Now, what would you say . . .?

Wimberly: I wouldn't say.

Henderson: Your face is an Episcopal face.

Wimberly: It smiles at primates

Then goes back in place.

Henderson: The diocese furniture?

Wimberly: Oh, it suits me fine.

Henderson: The national letterhead?

Wimberly: A valentine.

Henderson: Anything you're against?

Wimberly: Unemployment.

Henderson: When they want brilliant thinking

From the bishops

Wimberly: That is no concern of mine.

Henderson: Suppose a man of genius

Makes suggestions?

Wimberly: Watch that genius get suggested to resign.

Henderson: So you play it the Episcopal way?

Wimberly: All church policy is by me OK.

Henderson: You'll never rise up to the top.

Wimberly: But there's one thing clear:

Whoever Schori inhibits,

I will still be here.

Henderson: Oh, you certainly found a home!

Wimberly: It's cozy.

Henderson: Your brain is an Episcopal brain.

Wimberly: The church washed it,

Now I can't complain.

Henderson: Hey, the church magazine!

Wimberly: Oh, what style, what punch!

Henderson: The GC restaurant!

Wimberly: Ev'ry day same lunch:

Their haddock sandwich; it's delicious!

Henderson: I must try it.

Wimberly: (Early in the week.)

Henderson: Do you have any hobbies?

Wimberly: I've a hobby; I play gin with Mr. Crews.

Henderson: Mr. Crews! And do you play it nicely?

Wimberly: Play it nicely . . . still, he blitzes me

In every game, like that!

Henderson: Why?

Wimberly: 'Cause I play it the Episcopal way.

Schori's policy is by me OK.

Henderson: Oh, how can you get anywhere?

Wimberly: Junior, have no fear;

Whoever Schori inhibits,

I will still be here.

Henderson: You will still be here.

Both: Year after year after fiscal,

Never take a risk-al year!