Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Fisking a Satanist

I reproduce here, in full, a rather silly rant from StandFirm.

Dear christians,
Hi there. My name is Sam, and I’m the young man in the photo above holding the sign with the “implications involving violence, death, and genocide.” You can no doubt imagine my amusement upon checking my email this morning and discovering that overnight I had become a posterboy for hatred of christianity. I feel that this would be a good place to expand upon the sentiments expressed in my sign.
I feel that the christian faith is the most contemptable collection of delusions to have ever besmirched the Earth. For centuries your churches have supressed free thought, burned people at the stake, perpetuated genocide against indiginous peoples, amassed incredible fortunes at sword-point, molested children, etc, etc, ad infinitum. All in the service of a ludicrous imaginary being who exemplifies all that is most base and vile in the reactionary mindset. You claim to love your enemies while torturing them into renouncing their natural convictions. More people have suffered as a result of your “love” then any other genocidal movement in the history of the world. You describe all that is good and natural in this world as a sin, and hold the false docrine of eternal salvation like a carrot before a donkey as you perpetuate your infamous crimes. Any person with two grains of logic can see that your doctrines are the silliest of falsehoods. This is why you have earned my contempt; because you despoil the earth by your very presence upon it. Lucifer is the bringer of enlightenment, and the day is dawning when the youth of America shall follow the example set by their Norwegian comerades in their battle against your false doctrine of death worship. The night sky shell be set alight by the blazing of your sanctuaries, and, hopefully, your immortal souls can be released from the bondage of this wicked Earth which you hate so much, in the form of the martyrdom you relish, and you can go to meet your maker in a more timely manner then you would be otherwise inclined to take.
If you wish to share your thoughts with me, please feel free to visit my blog at:
http://pfirsich666.livejournal.com/

Hail Satan!
Rev. Coyotel Samuel Maxwell


It has been a while since I've applied the dual headlights of reason and reality to the darkness so let's fisk it, shall we?

"Hi there. My name is Sam, and I’m the young man in the photo above holding the sign with the “implications involving violence, death, and genocide.” You can no doubt imagine my amusement upon checking my email this morning and discovering that overnight I had become a posterboy for hatred of christianity. I feel that this would be a good place to expand upon the sentiments expressed in my sign."


Well, I took the liberty of checking our pal Sam out. Here is what he has over on LiveJournal:
"White male. 23 years of age. Oakland. California. Satanist. Anarchist. Libertine. Drugs & alcohol. BFA in Painting. Drives a pickup.

Working knowledge of:
Painting. Drawing. Printmaking. Black & white / digital photography. Glassblowing. Casting. Welding. Blacksmithing. Aikido. Capoiera. Bass. Guitar. Flute. Clarinet. Piano. The occult."

In other words Sam is your basic West Coast Arts guy. He went the occult route rather than the hippy dippy route but it all seems rather standard. He does play an awful lot of instruments, so I admit to being a tad jealous.

Let's read on.

"I feel that the christian faith is the most contemptable collection of delusions to have ever besmirched the Earth."

Well, feelings are of course paramount in this world of ours. I feel I ought to be richer than Bill Gates, but wishing hasn't made it so. The first sentence is rather bold but very subjective.

"For centuries your churches have supressed free thought, burned people at the stake, perpetuated genocide against indiginous peoples, amassed incredible fortunes at sword-point, molested children, etc, etc, ad infinitum."

Golly. Well, for starters, the church has been around for millenia. So whatever naughtiness we've been up to, we've been doing it for longer than mere centuries. Secondly, I would have thought a Satanist would approve of such activities. So is all this simple jealousy? I'm not really aware of any religious based genocide against indigenous peoples by the church nor do I believe that the church has ever perpetuated it. Perhaps Sam means perpetrated? Irregardless the track record of the Church is rather good as regards to the original inhabitants of the Western Hemisphere. The Dominicans and especially Franciscans worked tirelessly to restrain the Conquistadores. I do admit that there have been some very egregious Christian leaders, including some Popes. On the balance though, all of the denominations have established churches, hospitals, schools and colleges, fed the hungry, housed the homeless and clothed the naked. We have been about this work for the aforementioned millenia.

"All in the service of a ludicrous imaginary being who exemplifies all that is most base and vile in the reactionary mindset."

A Satanist is claiming the Christian God is imaginary? My brain hurts. Is Sam an agent provocateur for the Excedrin company? In specific, this sentence is yet more hyperbole with no fact or justification.

"You claim to love your enemies while torturing them into renouncing their natural convictions."

Ah yes, that would explain the racks and iron maidens over at the Methodist church.

"More people have suffered as a result of your “love” then any other genocidal movement in the history of the world."

This gets oft repeated, but it is demonstrably false. In order of homicides, the most murderous ideologies ever are:

1. Communism, far and away. If you separate it by country, then it gets the four of the top five slots.
2. Nazism
3. Islam (check out the death toll in the India-Pakistan split, for example)
4. Non-Communist Socialism
5. Fascism

The Twentieth Century has much to answer for. Christianity does not even come close. I would note that all of the top five ideologies are vocally anti-Christian. Looks like Sam is in good company, then.

"You describe all that is good and natural in this world as a sin, and hold the false docrine of eternal salvation like a carrot before a donkey as you perpetuate your infamous crimes."

I rather like classical music, and I'm fairly certain that doing so is not sinful. I like puppies and kittens. That isn't a sin either. I'm afraid I'm a bit clueless as to what 'good and natural' things he thinks I think are sinful. As for eternal salvation, he can always wait and see whether it is false or not. I'm absolutely positive I have not committed any crimes in recent memory. So I am not perpetuating anything. If anyone is perpetuating crimes, I blame Greg Griffiths. :)

"Any person with two grains of logic can see that your doctrines are the silliest of falsehoods."

If only Sam had two grains of logic. Actually I thought logic was measured by the premise and the conclusion, rather than a volumetric or weight measurement. Silly me.

"This is why you have earned my contempt; because you despoil the earth by your very presence upon it. Lucifer is the bringer of enlightenment, and the day is dawning when the youth of America shall follow the example set by their Norwegian comerades in their battle against your false doctrine of death worship. The night sky shell be set alight by the blazing of your sanctuaries, and, hopefully, your immortal souls can be released from the bondage of this wicked Earth which you hate so much, in the form of the martyrdom you relish, and you can go to meet your maker in a more timely manner then you would be otherwise inclined to take."

I don't think I worship death, quite the opposite. Apparently Lucifer is also bringing in the day of purple prose as well. I would remind Sam that murder, the actual physical kind, remains a crime in all fifty states. While I am perfectly willing to die for my faith, precipitating that end on his part would likely result in either a long prison term or execution in my home state. Just FYI.

So, upon review, what Sam has said here is a lot of hyperbole, some verifiably false assertions and a fair amount of mis-spelled venom.

Sam will be in my prayers.

1 comment:

Sangus said...

Hmmm, if I'm so "evil" -- being a Christian and all -- is Lucifer going to punish me or reward me, when I finally get to hell?

Being an adult is just SOOOO confusing! Can I go back, please, Mr. Pan?????